Give A Man A Fish And He’ll Make Sushi…

Sushi

Japan and beyond

If seeing dinner alive bothers you, this sign is for you

If seeing dinner alive bothers you, this sign is for you

Before we get started, any of you shrimp boat captains who down a few California rolls and beat your chest in sushi-eating triumph are going to want to sit down for this one. Don’t get me wrong, I occasionally like cucumbers and avocados wrapped in rice with canned tuna, but there’s a plethora of gastronomic wonders out there that are as much a presentation extravaganza as they are an explosion of taste. As with anything else, I’ll start you out easy.

It’s no secret that for years I shied away from sea urchin roe (uni, to you sushi aficionados). They say your first time is always the best, but trying uni in a restaurant in Southfield, Michigan is the quickest way to prove that adage wrong. The best bet is to try it near the coast, or at least in a restaurant where they take them out of the tank and open them up prior to eating. The roe (egg sacs/ovaries) are the desirable parts of the urchin (an animal that looks like a highly inedible pin cushion). Since my horrific Michigan experience I have had uni on several occasions at restaurants in the Southern California area and have fallen in love with the cool, creamy and slightly salty sea paste. Uni is fun to work with since its bright orange color makes it almost ornamental; it is mostly served sitting atop a rice and seaweed disk. We’ll come back to uni in an over-the-top presentation in a bit.

Delicious creamy monkfish liver

Delicious creamy monkfish liver

What’s that? “OK, Val, sounds interesting but we want the hard core stuff”. Well so do I, and that’s why I couldn’t pass up the offer to join friend, blogger, author and radio personality Eddie Lin for a visit to one of southern California’s meccas of sushi, The Hump in Santa Monica. Recently The Hump has been in the national news for being caught in a sting operation by the crew who filmed the Oscar-winning documentary, “The Cove”; they had sold sei whale meat to patrons with hidden cameras. The restaurant has decided to voluntarily and permanently close their doors after the incident, meaning that you’ll have to go elsewhere to enjoy the sushi extravaganza I am about to describe. And before you ask, no. I did not eat, nor was I offered whale during the feast.  Chef Kiyoshiro Yamamoto pulled out all the stops – the first course was a work of art. A Japanese cucumber was skinned and then cut into thin long and narrow strips. On the flat surface, Chef  Yamamoto added some orange rind, black truffle and honey, which was daubed onto the cuke with a king bee that was doing the dead-man’s float in the jar. Once rolled, Japanese uni was placed on top, along with some slivers of truffle, a tiny cooked shrimp and a dusting of gold flakes. An individual piece was served on a dish that looked like stone – the preparation and presentation was incredible. I didn’t know if I should eat it or put it in a glass case, but eat it I did, an explosion of flavors and textures doing a ballet in my mouth. I was ready to go home and never eat again, when the second course was presented.

Braised shiraco (cod sperm sacs)

Braised shiraco (cod sperm sacs)

For round 2, a pair of cod shiraco were braised and presented on an ornamental plate, adorned with some shaved green onion and several dipping sauces. The initial reaction to looking at the shiraco was to wonder – is that the fish’s brain? Well, being that these are from a male fish it is from the part that does the thinking in the spring time; shiraco is the Japanese name for the cod’s sperm sac. I’ve eaten Rocky Mountain Oysters, lamb fries and chicken nuts, but this was one for the books. The shiraco were actually quite tasty, with a nutty (oops, how did that slip in) and protein-rich taste not unlike a knockwurst.

Round 3 looked like the one with the T.K.O. – Chef  Yamamoto prepared live lobster sashimi. There are no words descriptive enough to put you in the orchestra seats for this one but I’ll give it my best shot. With deft knife work, he quickly dispatched the aquatic spider, neatly severing the tail from the body. He worked quickly, opening the tail and removing the meat. Some pieces were left in big chunks, while other pieces were chopped fine and combined with soy sauce and other ingredients to make a topping. On top of the raw lobster meat, uni was added, along with more truffles and gold disco glitter. The tail was presented on a tray with unusual tempura vegetables (including fiddleheads) and in the middle – the front end of the still-moving lobster. It was a little unsettling, like eating chicken drumsticks while the bird’s live torso is looking at you, but the lobster was indeed dead. Its complex nervous system caused it to continue to move after its demise. While eating the sweet lobster sashimi, the torso was whisked away to prepare a miso soup that was brought out afterwards.

Lobster sashimi is served while the lobster watches

Lobster sashimi is served while the lobster watches

Stop the presses, because the champ pulled out a stunning 1-2 punch for the finale. A live, wriggling eel was placed on the counter, and Chef Yamamoto crowned him with a spike right through his head… right through his head (sorry Mick). The fish died instantly, but someone forgot to tell him that. After its head was severed, a sharp knife neatly butterflied the fish length wise. With a quick hand, Chef  Yamamoto removed all the internal organs, yet the eel continued to wriggle. The spine was removed completely and I witnessed something that to this day continues to inspire awe – the spine was still moving. The eel was lightly fried, and the spine was fried so that the small brittle bones made a tasty, crunchy snack.

It would trivialize the event to simply say I went out for sushi. The presentation, the arrangement, the art of preparation all made for a spectacular evening that culminated in a delicious and exotic meal. I think I can now explain that dream about falling asleep on the beach and hearing knives being sharpened.

NOTE: This meal was part of a promotional event

GALLERY: See more images of Val eating sushi

The chef at The Hump prepares live eel (not for the squeamish)


See the TV spot from when Val joined Eddie Lin at The Hump for live sushi

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Extending The Olive Branch

El Paso del Robles, California
Paso Robles Olive Festival

It is difficult to miss the Olive Festival entrance

It is difficult to miss the Olive Festival entrance

It’s hard to imagine a festival centered on the humble olive, but since 2004, the city of El Paso del Robles, California has taken celebrating the Middle Eastern fruit tree to extravaganza status. The inhabitants of the town (generally referred to simply as Paso Robles) needed something to help them recover from a devastating magnitude 6.6 earthquake that struck on December 22, 2003. The quake destroyed a historic clock tower and the Mastagni Building, as well as creating serious damage to other structures including the 1908 Carnegie Library building in City Park. The clock tower was rebuilt, the library restored and the park was selected as the site of the Olive Festival. The festival increases in popularity each year – the region has the perfect climate for growing olives and grapes, resulting in the participation of a slew of olive orchards and vineyards. You would think the festival would focus on selling jars of little green olives with their tiny pimento turtle heads sticking out, and you would be partially right, but it is dedicated to all things olive.

A photo opportunity gone horribly wrong

A photo opportunity gone horribly wrong

As with other festivals, live music is provided – in 2009, the Big Rock Balalaikas Band provided traditional Baltic music on instruments that looked like they were built by a professor of geometry with impossibly triangular bodies. The park’s paved walkways extend out in an “X” from the center where the Carnegie Library building (now housing the Paso de Robles Area Historical Society) is located; each is lined with tents selling everything from custom-blended olive oil to olive tree saplings. Experiencing the art of sampling olive oil is akin to attending a wine tasting – at some booths dishes holding a shallow pool of oil are soaked up with little chunks of fresh bread, while others provided tiny sample cups for “olive oil shots”. Tasting a tiny cup of olive oil takes some getting used to, and there was only so much I could drink before getting greased. At the Lucero tent, little metal kegs sat on a table that allowed sampling from the spigot, and for users to fill up bottles on their own. In addition to oil made from different varieties on olives, there were also blends of olive oil with other flavorings including orange, rosemary, red apple and lemon, and flavored balsamic vinegar. Naturally olives were available, canned with spices, stuffed with garlic, almonds, jalapenos, feta cheese – the sky’s the limit. One vendor was selling something given the curious title of “Frog Balls”, which was neither – they were dill pickled Brussels sprouts.

Braving the olive-oil ice cream

Braving the olive-oil ice cream

The gazebo featured an Open Olive Dish Cooking Contest, which sadly (like many of the other food-oriented festivals) has a panel of official judges, meaning that the general public doesn’t get to enjoy the olive-based creations. For those willing to purchase culinary delights prepared with olives, one of the paths was dubbed “Culinary Row”. Many of the vendors are local restaurateurs, and they are allowed to sell food provided they adapt their recipes to include olives. I opted for homemade tamales from Garcia’s Tamales, locally made and sold out of a trailer. They were steamed to perfection with the perfect amount of black olives (added specifically for the festival) and just the right amount of spiciness. Maybe the psychological effect of buying food out of a van and eating it outdoors was at work, but either way it was my win. At five dollars for two tamales, it was the best food deal at the festival. For dessert the only logical choice was at the WeOlive.com booth – they were serving olive oil ice cream created by Doc Burnstein’s Ice Cream Lab in Arroyo Grande. The ice cream was free, eliminating the economic risk factor of trying it and not liking it. As far as the taste was concerned, it didn’t have the overpowering essence of olives – in fact, all the olive oil appeared to offer was an oily sensation to the rather plain tasting ice cream. It was sweet, creamy and oily – a strange consistency but not an unusual flavor.

Though the Olive Festival is small in comparison to the Gilroy Garlic Festival, there’s still enough to hold the interest and taste buds of olive lovers, and there’s no beating the free admission. It’s a celebration, a party – an army of olives looking for the right martini.

Paso Robles Olive Festival
Downtown Paso Robles City Park
835 12th Street
Paso Robles, CA 93446-2253
GPS coordinates: 35°37’34.46″N 120°41’24.83″W

Doc Burnstein’s Ice Cream Lab
114 W. Branch Street
Arroyo Grande, CA 93420
GPS coordinates: 35°7’23.03″N 120°34’46.65″W

GALLERY: See more images of the Paso Robles Olive Festival

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Don’t Eat The Pig In The Poke

Poke salad (poke weed)

Southern United States

The lovely and often deadly pokeweed
The lovely and often deadly pokeweed

If you have to assign a Surgeon General’s warning to any of the culinary delights I’ve eaten, it is undoubtedly poke salad.  Drugs.com lists some of the symptoms of “poke poisoning” as “severe stomach cramping, nausea with persistent diarrhea and vomiting, slow and difficult breathing, weakness, spasms, hypotension, severe convulsions, and death”. It’s the “death” part that can be a little intimidating, but people in the rural South have subsisted on it during lean times. Obviously this isn’t something you can get by waltzing into the Piggly Wiggly and making a beeline for the canned vegetables or the produce aisle. So what would make someone who enjoys being alive want to try this foreboding vegetable? Probably the same sense of adventure shared by those who try fugu, mixed with the survival instinct that kept the first person to eat a tarantula alive. It is said that even starving animals will avoid eating the plant – the only part of the plant deemed somewhat edible are the young, green leaves (once they start turning reddish it is too late to harvest).

Safe enough to feed to my mom. Seriously.
Safe enough to feed to my mom. Seriously.

My education about eating poke salad came from participating in a good friend’s annual family reunion in Hamilton, Alabama. It was at this time that an aunt showed me what the plant looked like and said if I picked it, she’d cook it. This was the one time that there seemed to be something more important to worry about while wandering through the woods than deer ticks and rattlesnakes. I gathered about 2 shopping bags filled with the leaves, which sounds like a lot, but her trained eye could spot the leaves that were too old to be safe. The preparation was simple – the leaves were boiled, and then rinsed. Then boiled and rinsed. Then boiled and rinsed. Finally in a well-seasoned iron skillet, some small chunks of bacon were cooked down for the fat, and then the pokeweed was added with some eggs, onions and a little pepper and salt. To the casual observer this could have been spinach, but the first bite lets you know otherwise. The consistency was like spinach, but there was a pleasant but bitter bite to it. A word of caution – the bacon left in the pan seems to absorb the bitterness, making it extremely foul tasting. Was it good? Delicious! Was I worried? No, in the capable hands of an expert it was safe enough to have offered it to my mom. My parting words on poke salad – kids, don’t try this at home.

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A Story That’s Not Hard To Swallow

San Juan Capistrano, California

Fiesta de Las Golondrinas

Close up view of the swallows nests

Close up view of the swallows nests

In 1776, while the English colonists were throwing down with the British in the east, Spain was having its way with the Acjachemen band of native Americans in the west, founding a mission in the place now known as San Juan Capistrano, California. San Juan Capistrano was the 7th mission founded in Alta California, and boasts the oldest structure still in use in California (the Serra Chapel). When the stone church was built (a departure from the adobe used in the other mission churches) it was one of the tallest structures in California, making its high walls an attractive substitute for the cliffs where the Cliff Swallows (Petrochelidon pyrrhonota) had built their homes for milennia. The swallows built their mud nests at the mission, flying off to the western coast of South America in the winter, returning again in the spring to procreate.

Ruins of the old stone church

Ruins of the old stone church

The mission inhabitants noted that the swallows “miraculously” returned to the mission on the Catholic feast day of Saint Joseph (March 19) each year, giving the event divine significance. Not being naturalists, they failed to realize that the reason the pagan feather dusters returned on March 19 was not because of Saint Joesph, but because of the vernal equinox – spring. Yes, spring, when thoughts of procreation fill their pointy little heads. Swallows reuse their nests year after year (not surprising knowing the amount of time it takes to make them, one beakful of mud at a time), so returning to the mission or any tall cliff-like structure where they had previously built their dream home is a foregone conclusion. The odd fact is that the individual bird does not reuse the same nest; the colony shares the nests, and it’s first-come, first-served. Their aerial dance when choosing their nests is a sight to behold; solo pilots drop out of the swirling cloud to claim the choice real estate.

In the 1930s, the Swallows Day Parade evolved from a school festival (Fiesta de Las Golondrinas, or Festival of the Swallows) to the celebration it is today. The parade winds past the front of the mission, and normally features floats, equestrian riders and marchers that celebrate the mission’s Spanish and Native American heritage, and the return of the swallows. There are tents and booths set up inside the mission, with music, food and celebration – about the only thing missing is the swallows. Right about now, you’re asking, “What’s the deal with a parade and festival celebrating the return of the swallows without, um… swallows?” Good question. Well for starters, why ruin a damned fine party just because the guest of honor doesn’t show up? Where else are you going to see someone standing on the shoulders of a marching bull while doing rope tricks? You know you want that fresh native food they’re cooking inside! So go to the parade and fiesta and I’ll share a little secret with you.

Just plain nuts (so is the vaquero)

Just plain nuts (so is the vaquero)

Around the turn of this century, work needed to be done on the mission to ensure it met earthquake resistant standards. During this process, the mud nests had to be removed from the tops of the mission buildings, and I think you and I both know “removed” means “destroyed”. So what’s the problem? The birds will come back, build new nests, and everyone goes home happy, right? When you get off the plane after a 6-month trip south to find your neighborhood gone, you think twice about rebuilding, so they simply went elsewhere. The mission tried all kinds of ideas to get them to come back, such as mounting ceramic nests, but to the swallows these were the equivalent of FEMA trailers. So here’s where I share my secret: go to the festival, have fun, and before sunset get in the car and take a short drive over to Saddleback College. Head over to the Technology and Applied Science building and park your lawn chair by the arched tower at the entrance, for this is one of the locations where the colony now calls home. You can see the swallows here all spring, but the show they put on as they descend in a mass of moving feathers to claim their nests on their return is breathtaking. You can still see the world famous return of the swallows, and just for fun, bring something from El Pollo Loco to munch on…

Mission San Juan Capistrano
26801 Ortega Highway
San Juan Capistrano, CA 92675
GPS coordinates: 33°30’7.20″N 117°39’45.85″W

Saddleback College
Technology and Applied Science Building
28000 Marguerite Parkway
(College Drive East)
Mission Viejo, CA 92692-3699
GPS coordinates: 33°33’18.65″N 117°39’45.12″W

GALLERY: See more images from Fiesta de Las Golondrinas and the swallows at Saddleback College

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Through The Looking Glass

Fort Bragg, California

Glass Beach

People scavenge for glass on Glass Beach

People scavenge for glass on Glass Beach

There are some places on earth that blur the distinction of what is natural and what is man-made; other places where mankind’s disregard for the environment results in the creation of a place of unusual beauty, where one man’s trash truly becomes another man’s treasure. One such place is Glass Beach, in California’s Mendocino County. In the 1940s, residents used this small stretch of shoreline as a dump, a practice unimaginable today. Household items were discarded into the sea, from bottles and dishes all the way up to old cars. In the 1960s, the dumping was stopped and the state closed the dump, making efforts to remove what large waste items they could – nature took care of the rest. Over the years, the surf rolled and pounded the trash against the rocks and tumbled them in the sand until there was not much more than pebble-sized items left. Since a great deal of the trash was glass, it is the primary component of the pebbles that cover the entire beach, giving the beach its recent name. Continue reading

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