Mary, Queen of Scots

ScotsFestival and International Highland Games XXI
The Queen Mary, Long Beach, California

Photo courtesy of The Queen Mary

Photo courtesy of The Queen Mary

For those in Southern California who want to get in touch with their inner-Scot (or at least a peek under the kilt), The Queen Mary in Long Beach is hosting its 21st annual ScotsFestival & International Highland Games this coming weekend (February 15 and 16). In addition to competition in traditional Scottish games, there will be live music, a Grand Parade, authentic food from Scotland (including the post-Burns Night Address to the Haggis), whisky tasting and coronation ceremonies. Information and tickets available at http://queenmary.com/scotsfestival/.

The Queen Mary
1126 Queens Highway
Long Beach CA 90802
GPS Coordinates: 33°45’9.01″N 118°11’25.20″W

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Prose and Kahn’s

Red Med at Formosa
West Hollywood, California

Green light means "go"

Green light means “go”

Of late, the Hollywood hotspot that once was the place to see and be seen has been looking a little long in the tooth; back in 1925 when boxer Jimmy Bernstein turned a dismantled Red Car trolley into the Formosa Cafe, its namesake island was still decades away from being reborn as Taiwan. The dimly lit lounge has lost some of its luster over the years, devolving from being the watering hole to the stars to a dusty little neighborhood bar – but if restaurant impresario Adam Fleischman and the team behind master forager and Chef Jordan Kahn’s Red Medicine have their way, their recent partnership with the Formosa Cafe will transform the historic eatery back into a gastronomic destination.

Ginger Daiquiri a la Central

Ginger Daiquiri a la Central

Those worried that the little red engine that once served as a quaint meeting place for Hollywood’s A-list to rub elbows and chow down on Americanized Chinese food will be hipsterized beyond recognition needn’t be nervous – Fleischman has a reputation for modernizing while maintaining the historic ambience of a property. As Red Med at Formosa, the bar will continue to offer traditional libations but will also feature new and innovative cocktails; for the diner crowd looking for that late night cuppa joe, they’ll also be percolating Handsome coffee by the pot as well as offering cold-brewed and Vietnamese-style iced coffee. For now, the trolley decor, faux leather booths and frosted glass candles will stay, along with glass cases filed with novelty decanters and the hundreds of autographed 8×10 glossies with famous faces pressed against glass frames; changes will be small at first such as improving the lighting in order to show off the Chef Kahn-designed menu.

Snap, crackle and pop rock shrimp

Snap, crackle and pop rock shrimp

Although the dishes will be closer to retro-Red Medicine than the elaborate plates that could double as fanciful flower arrangements, they’ll still have Jordan Kahn’s green thumbprint on them. Even the carnivore’s favorite, steak tartare, arrives at the table in a bowl bathed in an application of Nuoc Leo, blanketed with a layer of peanuts and water chestnuts and crowned with a fistful of sprouted lettuce, looking more like a potted plant than chopped, ultra-rare beef. Ruminants will delight in RM@F’s green papaya salad, a vegetarian dish with pockets of shredded pickled root vegetables, crispy taro chips, julienned jicama and greens; the sesame-marinated eggplant takes firm, cooked cubes and accompanies them with shaved celery, red cabbage and fresh, leafy mint.

Red Car style at Formosa Cafe

Red Car style at Formosa Cafe

Even the seafood is green – tender chunks of rock shrimp cooked in lime frolic in a shallow pool of neon-green aguachile and avocado scrapings, topped with chewy threads of fried ginger. The dish becomes a visual and aural experience when scooping up the ceviche into diminutive shrimp chip bowls, releasing a satisfying snap, crackle and pop. This is the legendary stuff that keeps you coming back for more like a strung-out seafood junkie. The fried Shanghai rice cakes are curious little medallions that have the taste and texture of a cross between scalloped potatoes, mochi and lamb fries, and like the beef tartare peek out from a clump of bacon, Shishito peppers and Thai basil.

Red Med at Formosa's bánh mì

Red Med at Formosa’s bánh mì

Confit chicken wings impart a sweet, tart and spicy flavor from cooking down Nước chấm with lime and Thai chiles, and the crispy rice coating gives them additional dimension; the savory pork bánh mì is pretty close to authentic, although Red Med at Formosa eschews the typical upper palate shredding French bread for a softer ciabatta that holds more of the dipped puddle of house-made Sriracha.

Red Med at Formosa looks to breathe new life into a mellow-aged remnant of the golden days of the silver screen, and hopefully they’ll be able to navigate the razor’s edge between maintaining their current neighborhood tavern clientele and enticing foodies in for a gastronomic adventure. Are you ready for your close-up, Ms. Desmond?

Red Med at Formosa
7156 Santa Monica Boulevard
West Hollywood, CA 90046
GPS Coordinates: 34° 5’26.05″N 118°20’46.02″W

GALLERY: See images from Val’s dinner at Red Med at Formosa Cafe in West Hollywood CA

NOTE: The cost for the food was provided by Red Med at Formosa. The content provided in this article was not influenced whatsoever by the organizer of the event.

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All The Young Girls Love Alice

The Big Unit
Alice Cooper’stown, Phoenix, Arizona

Just so there's no surprises

Just so there’s no surprises

Like the Paul Stanley/Gene Simmons-owned Rock and Brews and the now-defunct Lynyrd Skynyrd BBQ & Beer in Las Vegas, Phoenix’s Alice Cooper’stown entices with the promise of sex and booze and rock and roll, but takes the stage as a family-oriented, themed sports bar. The sports theme is amplified at Alice Cooper’stown by the partnership of shock rocker Alice Cooper and baseball legend Randy “The Big Unit” Johnson – instead of a Hard Rock Cafe knock-off, AC displays a hodge-podge array of Cooper’s (and others’) music paraphernalia and sports memorabilia. The location of the brick warehouse building under the shadow of  US Airways Center (home of the Phoenix Suns) and a few blocks from the Diamondbacks’ Chase Field guarantees standing room only post-games, although on a night when the stadiums are dark, it’s relatively easy to get a table. The layout is a bit confusing – unless you’re both a jock and a rocker, you may find the wall-to-wall displays erratic; Alice Cooper’s straightjacket on one wall, a Boston Bruins jersey adjacent. The deepest the wait staff delve into Cooper’s nightmare is to sport a cross between his harlequin eye make-up and eye black – unless you pay attention to the clippings lacquered into the table tops, you could easily forget who owns the joint, especially with games on the big screens competing with the blaring music.

The Bases Loaded Big Unit

The Bases Loaded Big Unit

As far as the fare goes, resign yourself to the fact that this is sports bar grub – the appetizers are decent, but the entrees are hit and miss (imagine a Cubano with avocado). The fried cheese curds are firm, yet gooey and satisfying; battered and deep-fried disks of red and green jalapeño have a nice kick. The standard menu alone isn’t honestly worth waiting in queue on game night, but there is one legendary item on the menu that alone is worth a return visit – the fearsome, baseball bat-sized behemoth known as The Big Unit. Johnson’s namesake is a colossal 22″ wiener that is every bit as formidable as it sounds. Anyone who purports that size doesn’t matter has never stared down the business end of this hot dog; although individual attempts have been made to go the full nine innings with The Big Unit, the wait staff relate the sad fate of those who think quaffing a few to help the John Holmes of sausagedom down in very graphic and disturbing terms.

In the belly of the beast

In the belly of the beast

This is not swordplay of exaggerated dimensions – The Big Unit can and should be shared by a table full of patrons. Food celebrities Anthony Bourdain and Adam Richman have both wrapped their lips around this sausage fest, although neither polished it off on camera. The basic Big Unit arrives at the table with both ends protruding from the baguette it rests in, surrounded by a clutter of fries, but the real challenge is stepping up to the plate to take down what is dubbed The Man v. Food Bases Loaded Big Unit after the master of masochistic mastication himself. As if the hefty beef sword wasn’t intimidating enough, this leviathan red hot is smothered with “Nightmare Chili”, bacon, cheese, sauerkraut, jalapeños, tomato, onions, and pickle relish and is enough to scare the daylights out of Linda Lovelace. While The Big Unit presents itself as a novelty dish that the kitchen hurriedly rushes out in anticipation of a celebration of carpet painting, the real surprise is that pound-for-pound, it’s actually quite an exceptional piece of meat. The Vienna Beef hot dog is of the same lineage as the fabled Chicago dog, and to try to consume it in a show of competitive eating superiority is a waste of its quality. The sausage has snap and is pink and moist all the way through, and would be an outstanding menu item at even a sixth of its size.

Cross-section of The Big Unit

Cross-section of The Big Unit

If for no other reason than to tackle The Big Unit, grab about five friends and rock on down to Alice Cooper’stown to enjoy on this memorable sausage. Should you chose to go it alone, I’m sure you’ll have a much clearer understanding of what Cooper had in mind when he said, “Welcome to My Nightmare”.

Alice Cooper’stown
101 E Jackson Street
Phoenix AZ 85004
GPS Coordinates: 33°26’41.69″N 112° 4’19.56″W

GALLERY: See images from Val’s visit to Alice Cooper’stown in Phoenix AZ

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A Whole Lot Of Bull

Chianina
Long Beach, California

Tender Piedmontese rib eye

Tender Piedmontese rib eye

Michael Dene’s latest Long Beach-area venture in the space formerly housing Kelly’s of Naples launched only a few weeks ago, but is poised to introduce diners to the rare and powerful breed of cattle that lends its name to the restaurant, Chianina. These white giants are an ancient breed from central Italy that have been bred as work oxen for millennia based on their size and musculature but are rarely found in the United States. These colossi can grow as tall as 7 feet and pack on over 3,800 pounds (a 6′ 8″, 3,400 pound specimen ranched in Bradenton, Florida tours the county fair circuit billed as “White Mountain, the Giant Steer”), but because Dene’s beef herd is not as populous as the bovine stalags visible along I-5 in Central California, the restaurant is not yet serving Chianina beef. Orson Wells undoubtedly would recommend that no beef would be served before its time, and Chianina is not in a rush to bring this unique beef to the table until it has developed on the Utah ranch to where it is prime for slaughter. Because the meat is exceptionally lean (it is the beef of choice for the classic Italian dish, Bistecca alla Fiorentina), the carcasses are aged whole for weeks, resulting in a tender and flavorful animal with every cut.

White Mountain, a massive Chianina steer appearing at County fairs

White Mountain, a massive Chianina steer appearing at County fairs

Until the herd is ready to harvest, Chianina is supplementing the menu with outstanding Piedmontese beef, an Italian cousin also low in fat and calories, and high in protein but with a dirty white coat. The daunting 42-ounce Porterhouse and 28-ounce rib eye may seem as insurmountable as White Mountain, but the cuts are meant to be shared – the rib eye will easily satiate two diners. The mildly seasoned and simply prepared beef is exceptional, melting in an ecstatic pool of saliva in your mouth; if the Piedmontese is capable of generating that kind of gastronomic arousal, you may want to accessorize your wardrobe with a pair of Depends once the Chianina debuts at the table.

Chianina's classic dining room

Chianina’s classic dining room

Chianina doesn’t diverge too far from the tried-and-true steakhouse path – the little black dress of salads, the classic wedge sports pomegranate jewels; firm root vegetables are accented with raisins and toasted almond. In addition to traditional meat offerings, Chianina also offers a decent oceanic selection including raw shellfish featuring a variety of oysters; razor clams can be ordered freshly shucked or in an amuse bouche with fennel that is reminiscent of East Coast baked stuffed clams. The risotto changes daily, so expect to find the creamy yet al dente pasta with accoutrements such as chunks of fresh lobster, black mussels and Manila clams. A pork belly appetizer could serve as an entry, porcine cubes sitting in a shallow pool of apple puree and lentils and crowned with wisps of fresh chicory and crunchy strips of chicharrón.

Pork belly reminiscent of chops and applesauce

Pork belly reminiscent of chops and applesauce

The restaurant can be forgiven perpetuating the recent Brussels sprout trend for presenting a dish of halved and near-caramelized roasted orbs sparingly accented with bacony pancetta and a conservative application of lemon. From what I sampled, there wasn’t a single throw-away dish or menu item that seemed like an afterthought; everything was fresh and representative of management’s penchant for using local farmers market produce and sustainable ingredients (such as the Jidori chicken). Artistic and not overly sweet desserts included a sturdy panna cotta and a chocolate cake that was more of a tribute to a chocolate lava-filled brownie. A separate menu is available at the bar, but when Chianina beef appears on it (as it recently did in the form of a burger), scarcity can be common.

For the time being Chianina beef is a coming attraction, but the current menu is more than adequate in providing a fulfilling opening act – the Chianina is worth waiting for, and that’s no bull.

Chianina
5716 E. 2nd Street
Long Beach, California 90803
GPS Coordinates: 33°45’23.77″N 118° 7’21.25″W

GALLERY: See images from Val’s dinner at Chianina in Long Beach CA

NOTE: The cost for the food was provided by Chianina. The content provided in this article was not influenced whatsoever by the organizer of the event.

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Looking For Mr. Goodsprings

Pioneer Saloon
Goodsprings, Nevada

Goodsprings' historic Pioneer Saloon and General Store

Goodsprings’ historic Pioneer Saloon and General Store

The setting sun paints the Bird Spring range a muted orange as a lone vulture circles overhead; the sedan pulls into the dirt parking area with the only audible sounds being earth crunching under the tires and the muted sound of a jukebox. As the music gets louder, you are conscious of your footsteps on the old, creaking boards on the porch. You enter through the side door, the bar lit by beer signs in a Christmassy neon glow – that’s when you notice the two bullet holes in the pressed-tin wall, an omen that these old walls may harbor some entities with unfinished business.

Pull up a stool, pardner

Pull up a stool, pardner

Trailer for a new Robert Rodriguez film? First paragraph of a Larry McMurtry novel? No, actually you’ve just entered Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings, Nevada, a mere 30 miles from Las Vegas nestled at the foot of the dregs of an old lead mining town. Now entering its centenary, Clark County’s oldest watering hole is the first sign of life on the ramshackle, 7-mile road that veers of Interstate 15 in Jean. Having room enough to belly up to the bar is a crap shoot – on some week-ends, parking is at a premium and there’s the risk of the kitchen being closed as the food runs out. On a quiet night, current owner Noel Sheckells will happily recount the history of the saloon he purchased almost a decade ago from Don Hedrick with the stipulation that he preserve the original structure. Built by local businessman George Fayle in 1913, the original tin walls and ceilings (purchased from Sears and Roebucks) have weathered the century well in the dry desert conditions, and very few commodities have been added over the years – a pot-bellied stove still provides warmth on cold Nevada nights.

Holes from the bullets that killed Paul Coski

Holes from the bullets that killed Paul Coski

Over the years, the saloon has seen its share of tragedy and frontier ruckus, which has contributed to the Pioneer Saloon’s haunted reputation. Patrons and staff have seen the spectre of a benevolent prospector from the town’s boomtown mining days; card sharp Paul Coski also makes an occasional appearance (apparently not pleased with his fate of getting a lead transfusion while cheating at a game of poker – the bullet holes can still be seen in the wall to the courtyard). Pioneer Saloon also served as base of operations for the 1942 search and rescue mission to recover the wreckage of actress Carole Lombard’s plane from nearby Mount Potosi. A distraught and anxious Clark Gable spend several days in the saloon before receiving the bad news about Lombard’s demise; one room has been dedicated as the Carole Lombard and Clark Gable Memorial Room, its walls covered with news clippings and memorabilia about the couple and the fateful flight.

The Carole Lombard Memorial Room

The Carole Lombard Memorial Room

In recent times, the saloon has become a ghost hunting destination with an appearance on the Travel Channel program, Ghost Adventures. In addition to ghost-themed events, Pioneer Saloon occasionally hosts “lock-ins” where ticket holders can wet their whistle sealed in the bar overnight in an effort to catch a glimpse of Goodsprings’ otherworldly residents. The general store vends victuals to the dwindling townsfolk who call Goodsprings home; for comestibles, there’s a basic menu, and even on a slow night the cook or bartender will fire up the outdoor grill in the back and slap a beef patty on it for you. There are also several gas grills available for rent out back at the meager cost of $5 should you choose to grill your own (they’re often used for cook-offs and other culinary events that bring in the foodie contingency from nearby Las Vegas).

Pioneer Saloon's bacon cheeseburger

Pioneer Saloon’s bacon cheeseburger

To celebrate their hundredth anniversary, Pioneer Saloon has erected a Centennial Wall on the east side of the tavern with the history of Goodsprings and its favorite watering hole. For a limited time, you can purchase a brick and space in their time capsule which will hold whatever you choose to fill a manila envelope with to be opened in 2113. Sure, you could guzzle a Mojito while blowing your paycheck at the Gold Strike Casino in Jean – but wouldn’t you rather rub elbows with the locals at the late 1800s Brunswick bar, knocking back a beer while the dusty wooden floor creaks beneath you? If you play your cards right, you’ll be able to tell the folks back home that your celebrity sighting on your Vegas vacation sported lead ventilation and a couple of aces up his sleeve.

Pioneer Saloon
310 Spring Street
Goodsprings NV 89019
GPS Coordinates:  35°49’56.74″N 115°25’54.92″W

GALLERY: See images of Val’s visit to the historic and haunted Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings NV

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